By Elizabeth Ambrose Children's Instructor at Ambrose Academy in Livonia, Michigan
What Martial Art Life Skills can be derived by children when you host a Parent's Night Out event?
How about Social and Emotional life skills that when presented in the right atmosphere, can elevated self-esteem, gain self-worth, better self-regulation, and more confidence dealing with social interactions.
Whenever we offer a parents night out event, children descend upon our establishment with great anticipation and excitement. For three and a half hours, parents get a chance to go out to a movie, dinner with friends or maybe stay at home for a few child-free hours of relaxation. The cost we charge is minimal for families and students can bring a friend for free.
It was suggested to me that we should advertise our events to non-students. I prefer to keep the event for students, their siblings and close friends. This creates a feeling of community allowing the children to interact with each other in a relaxed and nurturing environment without the added stress of little strangers reeking havoc. Not only do they have a great time getting to know and play with their classmates, they reap the many benefits associated with this unique social event. The 8 Social and Emotional Benefits for children when you host a Parent's Night Out event are:
Creating Memories
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| Quiet time - hanging out with new friends |
How do you create a memorable evening? Make sure activities let their strengths shine either cognitively or physically. Allow for free play, even near-rambunctious play for a few minutes to let out all that pent up energy. Make sure creativity is sparked by unexpected sources, such as props, face paint, craft corner, even bongo drums. Have structured play led by a mentor or leader. Put aside time for quiet play, reading, gaming, where children can be in close proximity to each other, sitting in groups talking. And of course, don't forget awesome snacks and the water keg.
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| So proud of their face paint |
Building Goodwill
The goodwill it builds is wonderful. Parents have thanked us profusely for the wonderful evening they were able to have or just for a peaceful time to be quiet and indulge in self-care. The kids get to run around in what I call "organized chaos" allowing them to release pent up energy, especially during the wintry months when they are stuck indoors. Parent and children get to blow off some steam and hopefully come back together much more relaxed and centered. We want to build positive community experience at our school, offering children another safe place to enjoy.Let's Flex Those Social Development Muscles
A teacher's goal is to set up activities that touch on the four domains of childhood development. The four domains are cognitive, physical, social and emotional. In our classes, we create opportunities to engage all four domains whenever possible. Although children get plenty of cognitive, physical, and emotional exercises in a good martial art life skills setting, there is less opportunity for real social competence training. Hanging out with peers, with minimal adult intervention, allows them to experience further growth in the social and emotional domains. They get to experience the stresses of interacting with peers in a safe space, learn from those experiences, are supported by staff with suggestions and guidelines leading toward emotional self-regulation (take into account other's reactions and feelings.) Peer acceptance is a critical factor in the well-being of children.Erik Erikson, a developmental psychologist known for his theory of on psychological development of human beings, believed that eight psycho-social stages of development focus on the resolution of different crises to become a successful and complete person.
During elementary school stage, children between the ages of 6-12 face the task of industry vs. inferiority. Children begin to compare themselves to peers seeking to answer the question, "How do I measure up?' They either develop a sense of pride and accomplishment or they feel inferior and inadequate in their schoolwork, relationships, and activities. Practice makes progress! Those that practice and work (industry) at their social skills help to resolve this conflict positively and with experience lead children to develop a sense of competency at useful skills and tasks.
By giving the children plenty of opportunities to interact with each other in many different ways, such as structured play, free play, creative play, and quiet play in a nurturing and inclusive environment, then social skills can be developed positively well before adolescence.
Building Bonds of Friendship
The children have little time to socialize during class, so an event like this allows them to play, talk, and be together in an environment that promotes positive peer pressure, the bonds of friendship, to strengthen and to form new ones. Our staff makes sure that interactions are as positive and supportive as possible, offering quick mediation and resolution when any issue arises. Kids teaching kids, is one of the best kinds of learning. They quickly learn the lesson of making friends - that being good human beings to one another is a win-win.In contrast to friendship, peer acceptance and rejection can be one sided. Friendships are a reciprocal relationship, a two way street. Friends talk and listen to one another. Friends offer support and loyalty, and respect and acknowledge each other's perspective. Friendship require more attention and effort. At events like Parent's Night Out, children have an opportunity to forge and strengthen a friend relationship that was started in class but never fully developed. To make a friend and to have them in your life for as long as possible is a true blessing. It means someone likes you best, an awesome feeling.
Mixed Age Group Interactions
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| Ages 5 to 15 |
Lev Vgotsky, an early child development theorist, developed the Vgotsky's Sociocultural Theory whose major theme of this theoretical framework is that social interaction plays a fundamental role in the development of cognition. I agree that there is much benefit for a child when a more experienced peer is able to provide the learner with "scaffolding" to support the student’s evolving understanding of knowledge domains or development of complex skills. Collaborative learning, discourse, modelling, and scaffolding are strategies that support the intellectual knowledge and skills of learners and facilitate intentional learning."
When an older child plays or mentors a younger one, skills and information are passed down with another perspective that a younger child may understand more readily and with good retention.
Building an Extended Community
The children get to bring a friend. This is good for our school environment. It brings together like-minded people. Children get to introduce friends to a new cool environment, taking pride in their school. Meeting friends means that I may get a new student that is as nice as the one I have now. It's a win-win. It expands our school's positive community, and creates an even more comfortable, nurturing and knowable atmosphere for the children in class.Hanging Out with Mentors and Role-Models
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| Nerf Captains |
Children get to interact and get to know better their role models and mentors in a new way seeking them out for support and for play. The leadership team makes sure that games and interactions are positive, friendly and safe. They also represent the "more expert peer" that help facilitate learning. For the older children, learning to "care give" younger ones is an exercise in patience and communication. This type of event helps older children gain good leadership and volunteer experience that are good on a resume submitted to National Honor Societies and colleges.Building Camaraderie Back in the Classroom
Back in the classroom, camaraderie is elevated. Support and encouragement from their peers makes class more enjoyable and rewarding. The children experience newfound comfort and trust in their environment, in the interactions with each other, and that they are safe to be who they are without judgment or ridicule, building true self-esteem. They find acceptance and inclusiveness, a place that supports their personal growth. This strengthens emotional and social fortitude and stability.Whether an event at Ambrose Academy is a Parent's Night Out, WCD Lock-in, holiday parties, or other group event, the purpose is to be a service to our school's community, to guide personal growth cognitively, physically, socially and emotionally, facilitating the well-being of our students and strengthening the relationships they have with the people they love. We want our students to take ownership, to look upon the school as their school, their club, their place, and a place that is consistent, nurturing and always welcoming.
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